Separation and Divorce

December 19, 2013

A Most Wonderful Time of the Year: Three Tips to help keep the Holidays Fun and Memorable for Your Entire Family

The holiday season is usually filled with joy as well as lots of stressful activity planning all the festivities. Wouldn’t it be wonderful to have some helpful reminders (“Tips”) to aid families dealing with a divorce or separation process to manage the additional emotional stress? Having a plan in place incorporating the following three tips would help make the holiday season enjoyable for everyone, children and adults, alike.

Number One Tip is to focus on the children. They need to be reassured that they are special and that this is a season for celebration. Children will want to be with both their parents and family members. So planning time together with children may be tricky. It is integral to make sure that the schedule is concrete and set ahead of time. If a parenting schedule has not yet been created, parents should sit down and work to make something that works for both parties and, most of all, for the children. If tensions tend to run high, parents can work with a collaborative attorney or mediator or parenting coordinator to set a schedule. When everyone has set expectations of where they are to be and when, everyone can then have the time to enjoy the time with their loved ones.

Something else to keep in mind is whether or not this is the children’s first holiday season with two households. The transition into a two-family household can be easier if a parenting schedule has been made. Children will most likely find the transition easier if they not only know when and where they will be spending holidays, but also have time to understand and to spend other holiday time with the other parent. The transition from one household for specified events to another household becomes less emotional and confusing when a plan is followed.
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December 6, 2013

International Divorce and What it Means in New York

by Deborah Hope Wayne

The divorce process can involve several obstacles. Every state has its own rules and requirements for filing and for the process itself. Divorce encompasses many intricacies, including the marriage contract, presence and residency of the parties, etc. It is important that the parties properly address the complexities of property distribution, child support, spousal support, parenting, health insurance, and other issues of the case in a manor that meets the requirements of the New York Courts.

One issue that may occur is how the divorce process changes (or remains the same) when international laws and elements come into play. With all of the modern advancements of today, including ease of travel and communication technology, it is becoming commonplace for someone to have some type of international relationship, whether it is friends, family, or even marriage.
International divorce can mean a few different things, depending on the parties themselves. International divorce may refer to the process abroad as opposed to in the United States. However, here we will focus on international divorce from the aspect of non-US marriages, divorces obtained outside the US, and ex parte non-US divorces.

New York recognizes both fault and no-fault grounds for divorce. The fault grounds include cruel and inhuman treatment, abandonment (for at least one full continuous year), adultery, three years or more of imprisonment, and conversion (when a separation is converted into a divorce). The no-fault ground for divorce in New York refers to the irretrievable breakdown of the marriage for a period of at least six months. It is important to note that this is just an overview of the grounds – each ground has certain requirements and bounds attached to it. These grounds apply to any divorce being sought in the state of New York, so citizenship of a spouse in a foreign country does not really come into play. However, there are instances of the divorce process where the international aspect will arise. For instance, a change in marital status may affect an application for citizenship. It is strongly recommended to consult with an immigration attorney as to the impact of divorce on immigration status.
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October 29, 2013

Using a Joint Bank Account for Child Support Payments

by Deborah Hope Wayne

When people discuss child support, it is often through assumptions and generalizations about how it works, who pays, and how much is paid. However, each state has unique laws dealing with child support, and it is important to know how your state works if the time comes for child support to be addressed. New York passed the Child Support Standards Act (CSSA) which outlines and charts the guidelines for child support payments. There is a chart released every year which takes into account the poverty line (as reported by the US Department of Health and Human Services) and allows individuals to calculate the approximate annual child support obligation. There is an option to deviate from the CSSA if using the guidelines would produce an unfair result or the parents agree that an alternative method of child support would be more beneficial to the family.

With all this in mind about the support calculations, the issue then turns to the actual child support payments. Just like people tend to assume sweeping generalities when it comes to how child support is calculated, there are also assumptions about how child support is paid out. Many people focus on the more invasive options like income withholding or liens on bank accounts. However, a recent trend involves the divorced couple setting up a joint bank account for purpose of support payments.

In some cases, parents elect to establish a joint bank account to address the children’s needs. Parents can make an agreement that specifies in detail how the account is to be funded and utilized. The account is then limited by those specifications agreed upon by the parties and memorialized in the agreement solely for the children’s needs. There can also be a joint bank account in addition to traditional child support, for specific purposes depending on the children’s needs. An important thing to remember is that any type of agreement for a joint bank account will be specific and unique to the parents and their situation. The parents can tailor the agreement and type of account so that it works best for them and the children’s needs.
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August 13, 2013

The Kitchen Table Divorce

by Deborah Hope Wayne

photo (2).JPG You and your spouse come to the realization that the relationship is no longer working for both of you. Whatever path you traveled to get to this point, whether it was a long and tumultuous journey or a clean and quick break, you are now faced with that word: divorce. Together, you both have figured out the general framework for who gets what, and taken care of assigning responsibility for payment of any debts, but may need help making sure that you have covered all of the details. You want to make sure the agreement you made at your kitchen table will be binding and that you understand all of the terms.

Neither of you wants to go through the grueling process and massive expense of litigation…and for what? You rent your home, you don’t have children or maybe they’re already out of the house. Does that mean you should navigate the divorce course on your own?

There is an approach which helps you to make sure you have covered all of the relevant details and that you have made a legally binding agreement. It’s called the “Kitchen Table” approach. It is an effective alternative to the expensive process of litigation, with the invaluable benefit of hiring a professional attorney-mediator with experience in divorce. This approach is generally for those couples who can amicably communicate face-to-face with each other about finances, support issues, and other fairly sensitive topics that come up during a divorce.

The “Kitchen Table” approach aims to keep the divorce process simple and amicable. It is essential to this process that you find an experienced attorney- mediator who you trust and with whom you feel comfortable discussing personal issues. After you have selected the right mediator, you and your spouse will meet with the mediator to review your informal agreement.
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